Date: 24 Feb 2011 8:31 pm Title: Newborn
There some very interesting turns in this story.
I think the way you changed back and forth between first person and third person works very well.
I really like the idea that Alice was a descendant of the one who changed her, and that the ability to see visions was passed down from him.
Date: 09 Jun 2010 2:56 am Title: Newborn
Interesting and intriguing. Looks like we've discovered from where Alice got her visions? He had probably been following the family for generations waiting for a family member that shared his gift. When Alice was incarcerated he made sure to stay near her. When he saw James in a vision he made the necessary decision, saved Alice and let her know of this vision of the Cullen's. As good a theory as any I've read.
Date: 28 Apr 2009 4:21 pm Title: Newborn
This was really a cool idea. I never understood why Alice fell for Jasper when there was a vampire in her past that loved her. If he was family, that would make much more sense. It would be cool to write something about her finding out about him.
Author's Response: Thanks. I wondered about that too. I like this idea better than thinking he was like Aro, and just interested in her power.
Date: 30 Jul 2008 11:09 pm Title: Newborn
i like the way you say hunter, and newborn, and old one. it's almost likea fairy tale. and the writing is very good.
except that again, you cahnge pov's halfway through.
Author's Response: OOPS! I didn't even think about it until you pointed it out. I needed to show both POVs, guess I should have used italics or something to note the change. Thanks for the input.
Date: 25 Jul 2008 3:47 pm Title: Newborn
when you said 'then I left my many times great granddaughter' ;
did you actually mean he was related to her?
Or did you mean it as though he treated her like his own.
Author's Response: I was trying to convey that he was her ancestor and that he also had her ability to see the future (and he has yellow eyes). Thanks for your review.
Date: 25 Jul 2008 2:15 pm Title: Newborn
I like this take on things. You have quite an original answer for a dangling question from the books. I'm off to peruse the rest of your stories now. You've quite the talent, love.
Author's Response: Thank you very much. The question just popped into my head, and I had to answer it.